What are you giving?

In India, it’s a very common sight to see beggars on traffic signals. A few days back, when I stopped at a signal, I saw an old beggar few metres ahead of my car. The driver of one of the vehicles gave that beggar a small bunch of bananas. He gratefully accepted them and walked across to the pavement. I saw another beggar, who was also very old, sitting over there. This first person sat next to the second one, shared his bananas with him and they both began eating. I could see an element of satisfaction in their faces.

Being so poor, he could have saved a few bananas for his next meal…why did he share?

I often see my wife giving some fruit or food to the housekeeping staff in my society when they come to clean the trash. After she gives them, she has a sense of satisfaction and says “they were so happy”. Whenever my son is eating something likes, he gives me a piece of it and says “eat”. When I eat and say it was nice, I can see a smile on his face.

As part of being socially responsible, Vikram Dhar, an internationally acclaimed NLP trainer, lets some students attend his sessions for nominal fee so they can help others who need it.

In Krishvi Gavakshi, the society where I live in Bengaluru, when any resident needs help (taking a print out/ share a ride to some place/any question they have or anything else) they would simply put it on the residents group in WhatsApp and the other residents come forward to help, whether they know the person seeking help or not. And they do it expecting nothing in return. Some even go an extra mile to help.

Why would someone do it? Here’s my rationale to it.

Human beings are social animals. We are wired to feel good when we see someone happy. That’s why when we see someone smile, inadvertently we smile. That is also the reason why we help others. No wonder our elders always said that happiness multiplies when it is shared – you give it in grams and you’ll get it back in tons. Once my friend Pradyuman said “the joy that you get when you share can only be felt and not  explained”. It’s so very true.

What do you think?




  1. Well Aaditya I totally agree that when we help someone the sense of satisfaction n joy we feel is not explainable but what I personally feel is when we help someone back of d mind we always have a thought that if I will do something good for others will get it return by destiny some day.. achha karo achha hoga.. means kahin na kahin we are selfish .hum achha karte hai kyuki hum nahi chahte hamare sath kuchh bura ho.. moral of the story.. dont feel proud after helping someone n never make that person feel that thing.. as obligation.

    Good day 😊

    1. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Jolly. While I agree with what you said, all I’d say is that we’re all human beings.

  2. I loved reading this post, it filled my heart with joy, thank you. It’s true that we get a lot of satisfaction from helping others. What is interesting is that we tend to feel more comfortable helping than being helped, have you noticed that too ? Or is it only here in France ? I have the feeling that most people Don’t like being helped or ask for help because they are afraid to have to “pay back” maybe. Personnaly having grown up in Africa (Cameroon) I both enjoy giving and taking because they both bring happiness either for me or for the other person, it’s win-win 😉

    1. Thank you for reading my post and taking time out to post the comments.
      You’ve made a very interesting observation. Here’s my take:
      There are two reasons why people don’t like seeking help – one is the pay back you mentioned, this is material. The second is more emotional. When we are seeking/taking help, our conscience feels that the person who’s helping us is superior to us which makes it difficult to accept. So…it’s the EGO! Location and culture have a role to play.
      The fact that you enjoy both giving and taking makes you a lot more receptive, which is good. When we are receptive, we are happier. God bless!
      BTW – I’ve been to Douala a few times, I have a few fond memories of the place.

      1. Oh you’ve been to Cameroon! Beautiful country with a lot of contrasts!
        Yes mister ego, present everywhere. See you soon!

        1. Our conversation prompted me to post on my FB page this morning. Thank you🙏

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